6 signs that it’s time to end a relationship

By Alaysia Williams

Sometimes we find ourselves stuck in a relationship that we don’t know how to get out of it, whether it’s romantic or platonic. Sometimes we don’t know if a relationship is even fulfilling anymore, but we stay because of time, familiarity and comfort.  Relationships are attachments that can change over time due to different life experiences. When you get rid of an attachment, such as a relationship that no longer is purposeful, you are making room for new and better things. 

6 Signs you need to leave a relationship that isn’t serving your mental health.

 

1. You have different intentions/expectations –

If you and the other person’s intentions don’t align, it then becomes difficult for the relationship to function well. This can result in someone getting hurt or confused. If expectations cannot be effectively communicated and understood, this is a sign to end the relationship and put your energy onto those that align with your expectations. 

2. You are no longer surprised by their behavior, and it’s exhausting you –  

Do you find yourself becoming immune to someone’s behavior after already communicating how their behavior makes you feel? Or how it is conflicting the relationship? Does it become exhausting to communicate your needs because you already know what to expect from this person?

If so, that’s another sign to leave the relationship. 

 3. If they left on their own, you’d be relieved –  

“I just wish he would leave or do something that would give me no choice but to end things.”

Do you find yourself negatively reacting to everything this person does? Do you avoid having the difficult conversation to end the relationship because you don’t want to hurt their feelings? Are you finding ways to make it easier for them to walk away?

Do yourself a favor and walk away first because you are at your breaking point.  

4. You’re acting small to make them comfortable – 

Even though a relationship consists of two people, you both should be evolving within the relationship as a whole and individual.

If you find yourself not able to be your most authentic self due to their character flaws, are you truly happy? Do you find yourself declining opportunities because you are worried about how it would make the other person feel? Do you frequently ignore your own feelings? Does this person really bring the best out of you, so you can be your best evolved self?

These are questions that should be asked when reflecting if a relationship is serving you or not. 

5. The Relationship feels like a duty/job – 

I understand at times we may have to do things that we don’t want to do–IT’S LIFE, but should a relationship fall under this category? Absolutely not! 

Forcing yourself to hang out with someone is not a good feeling and means the relationship isn’t genuine. This means you are only doing things because it’s the right or the nice thing to do, especially when you’ve known them for a long time. Also, maybe you feel obligated to still have them around because you’ve avoided addressing the issue.

In letting this relationship go, you both will be released. You will get rid of a job that’s not paying you and the person will find people that enjoys their company. 

6. You feel empty when you leave this person, they drain you mentally, emotionally and physically- 

If you feel that this person exerts all your energy and leaves you feeling empty and drained, staying longer won’t do good for your mental health. Relationships are meant to be reciprocal, the same way you pour into people, they should be able to pour back into you.

If you are unsure of this, reflect on how you feel after meeting with this person…energy never lies.   

Ending any relationship that no longer serve us can become a difficult process, but you don’t have to go through it alone. Should you need additional support with leaving a relationship, building awareness around if a relationship is fulfilling you and/or you are feeling stuck on what to do next, please contact our office at 212-433-2384/info@parkavenuepsychotherapy.com to schedule a session with me!